No time to stand still,

No time to breathe

No time to take stock

No time to grieve

I’m on the run

I’m working hard at being knumb

No time to stand still

No time to breathe

Afraid to take stock

Afraid to grieve.

~

Where is he?

Where is my daddy the little girl said?

Not out loud, just in her head

Your daddy is at the pub, drinking his children away

Where is my daddy the little girl said?

Your daddy is sleeping off a sore head,

You dare not wake him with your play

Where is my daddy the little girl said?

Your daddy is watching the television,

You best be as quiet as a mouse

Where is my daddy, the little girl said?

Your daddy is the ruler of this house

Where is my daddy the grown lady said

Your daddy will now never be a daddy ever…

Because your daddy is dead.

~

We had a lot of time but then a lot was too brief
When time stopped for you, when death was a thief
Oh there were good times, laughter and fun
Times to talk and sit soaking up the sun
Times to do a few chores, then the hours were few
Often more you needed me to do
Some tell me you had your time and it was time for you to go
Yet everything inside of me screams out NO
I loved hearing your stories as you walked me through years gone by
Some made us laugh and others made us cry
They were my favourite hours in your company
Me and you and endless cups of tea!
The march of the years saw your body grow weak
& Of moving to another world you would sometimes speak
Yet I did not see it coming, I did not see the end
There never ever could be a right time to lose you…
My beloved and forever friend.

~

I look heavenwards
Wanting
Longing
Hoping
Dreaming
Wishing
Willing
To have you here with me.

~

Give me one more day
One more squeeze of the hand
One more cuddle
One more smile
One more laugh
One more song
One more cup of tea
Give me one more day
To be with her
To talk to her
To listen to her
To see her smile
To see her face
To feel that warmth
Just one more day

~

Memories

Memories are the pictures stored in your mind
Some are warm
Some are precious
Some are painful and unkind
They are the remainders of yesterday
They are the reminders that nothing gold can stay
A sensation of warmth or a twinge of pain
A place to hold people dear
A place sometimes over shadowed with doubt and fear
Or to dwell on special moments, your mind is a wonderful room
Where you can find the people and times that were gone too soon.

~

Between Friends

Such wonderful conversations we have shared
We have talked and talked…we have truly cared
We have remembered the years now rolling by
We have sat and held hands allowed the other to cry
We have laughed and laughed until the tears of joy rolled
& Talked with an energy uncontrolled
We have shared a worry, a problem, a heart ache
We have been real, so real it could never be fake
We have debated politics and other views
We have talked over photos and yesterdays news
We have talked in silence, in silence there is a word
Held between two friends and always heard
We have talked with you in a hospital bed somewhat weary
& Me at your bedside, eyes all teary
It is our last conversation I hold so very dear to my heart
The words of symbols…a kiss blown to you…blown back to me
Our final conversation before us two friends did part
Alas we still talk now in my mind…
& There you are still you and I have not been left behind.

~

What Price?
What price for a life so young?
Just a teenage girl whose life had just begun
So much life to live and so much potential
Yet a thief most foul came to steal it all
What price?
A young, vibrant, beautiful life
You lived and died, the world does not see
One of its children who suffered so bitterly
It does not stop to count the cost
Another life that is lost
Who will ask the question
What price?
I am asking the question…
How much for a child’s life?

~

NOT
WILLING
NOT
READY
TO SAY GOODBYE
WAY TOO EARLY
TO MOURN
A LIFE
TAKEN SO
PREMATURELY
NOT
WILLING
NOT
READY
TO STAND
AT YOUR
GRAVESIDE
THAT VOICE
IN
YOUR
HEAD
TOLD YOU A
REAL
BAD LIE
NOT
WILLING
NOT
READY
TO SEE YOUR FAMILY
IN
PIECES
SUICIDE
IMPRISONS
MORE
SOULS
THAN
IT RELEASES
NOT
WILLING
NOT
READY
TO SAY GOODBYE
BECAUSE THIS IS
NOT
YOUR TIME TO DIE
NOT
WILLING
NOT
READY
THIS IS NOT
GOODBYE.

~

WHERE ARE YOU?

No…you would not leave me
…you cannot leave me
…been a mistake you know
…you were always there, here
…you always welcomed me
…had a laugh, calmed a fear
…you spoke to me every day
…I’m waiting for you to call, so much to say
…you must be lost somewhere
…I look in vain but you seem nowhere
…oh yes you are in my heart
…but I am still waiting to see you
…the waiting is making me feel so blue
…NO you would NOT leave ME

~

How can I even begin to describe
The physical pain I feel inside
Like a sharp knife being turned
Like fingers being burned
Fingers gripping at my heart
Feels like my soul is tearing apart
Nobody understands how I miss you
All the memories my mind flicks through
I see your face in my head
The grieve a fresh because you are dead
I miss you so much that I want to scream in agony
But who wants to listen to me?
They just tell me I have to let you go
& In the depths of my being I scream out NO
I feel so cold that I cannot get warm tonight
Now you are gone how can anything be alright?
How can I begin to describe…